Holding Back and Longing to Belt it Out!

You know that part of the song when she just lets loose and her voice soars into the sky and you're like "How does she hit that note...or make that rumbly sound in her throat?" You can't create that sound if you're holding back. There's only one way to reach that level...full on confidence. If you go for it 110% you'll hit it. If you go even 99% you miss the mark. 

I've been listening to "Never Forget You" by Zara Larsson & MNEK. 
Skip to 3:04 - She goes there (Especially at 3:11) This is what I'm talking about. 

Ahhh - I hate when I've been singing in the car with friends recently and we hit this part of the song and I watch my voice shrink away. It's safer to stop singing, sing quieter or just half-ass it than to fully go for it. It's even hard to fully go for it when I'm home all alone. I'm afraid of really reaching out with my voice because what if I try and I suck? What if I let go and I realize I'm not capable of making that sound? If I don't try, I don't fail...yet. Right? Ugh. Bad mentality.  

I'm no longer afraid of singing in front of other people because I know I'm good. I want to feel so free that I can sing (and belt it out) in front of other people even if I know I'm bad or worse...if I don't know either way if I'll be good or bad. It's the unpredictability that scars me. I want to control what sounds I share. I'm afraid of making a sound that is "BAD" and being judged as someone who tries but isn't good enough. These are all just voices in my head. People love it when they see other people really push and try...they still love you when you fail. Where does this fear come from? It's silly. How do I get rid of it?