Operation "Be a Spoiled Ass Hole"
I am a spoiled brat with good intentions. Here's why... My boyfriend gets home from work, runs in the door, grabs me, kisses me and hugs me so hard I could explode. I spend the next two hours spitting off stressy-vibes and complaining how I need more space in the house for all my activities. I need a music room, a branded office space, and a relaxing quiet room (in addition to the bedroom, bathroom and communal areas that I've already taken over with my furniture & shit) because I work from home and I need designated spaces to keep things organized and stress-free. If they're mixed, everything feels cluttered and I'm struggle to focus and feel peaceful. I'm trying to 'optimize' the environment I live in for greatest happiness. He stares at me - no empathy. I'm frustrated and explain myself again (with difference wording). No empathy. Grrr..... Really, it should come as no surprise that he has NO SYMPATHY for me because right after I explain my 'big problems' he says "you can use my game room as your music room" and I reply with, "yah, that's not going to work. It's got too many guy vibes with all the dark furniture etc..." It's a fucking miracle he doesn't slap me across the face right then & there. Instead, like the saint he is, he just smiles and says nothing. Hours later, he puts down his chopsticks and diplomatically explains his perspective. *For the record, he said one concise sentence but this was the heafty message behind it (as interpreted by moi): "You keep giving me reasons why you need all these rooms and why it's causing you stress not having everything set up 'just so'. We have a huge house and you share it with multiple people. You have everything you need, you've taken over more than the rest of us, and yet you demand more. You're spoiled and if I had come to you requesting a room for myself and you'd offered me your music room or office, my jaw would have dropped and I would ask with shocked gratitude, "Really?!" And yet you turn up your nose when I offer you my room, the only one I have and the one I'm generously offering to you as a solution to YOUR problem, because is not up to your standards." He picks up his plate and walks away. I hang my head in shame and tears drop into my guacamole. // Cha
PS: I took 10 minutes to beat myself up, ugly cry, look in the mirror, pull my shoulders back and decide to walk up to him and:
A) admit that I feel like an embarrassed asshole and apologize
B) thank him for his kind offer of his game room but politely decline; I'll make my music/office room work and he can keep his game room
C) acknowledge my spoiled attitude and commit to converting it into an attitude of minimalism and gratitude
His reaction: he gave me a big kiss, forgave me for everything and whispered in my ear that if he had an extra room to give, he would give it to me.
My reaction: phew, what a wake up call and a weight off my shoulders, grateful to toss off this shitty emotional baggage and realize that shrinking my stuff into a smaller space is an opportunity for me to grow into a bigger person