Singing on Seattle Skyscrapers at Night

The wind blew across my legs and I opened my eyes. The skyscrapers of Seattle were sparkling in the night and I was up in the high air with them; singing my songs on a rooftop, dozens of listening ears pointed my way. I was totally fucking up the guitar chords, distracted by thoughts and faces but I kept playing. I swayed around searching for the microphone with my voice and I smiled at the girl I had befriended a few minutes before performing. "How did it feel?" Spence asked me after I played my final song. I blabbed some filler words about how I could do better but I had fun. He asked me again, "But how did it feel?" 

Driving home through the midnight across the I90 floating bridge, I asked myself this question again and again. Spence wasn't asking me how I performed or how well I played. He asked me how it felt. It seemed like the kind of question that only another artist would think to ask. It felt tight and open at the same time. My body was tense, I hardly moved and my throat was croaky but I was also singing without paralyzing fear, I was singing on a rooftop, people were cheering for me, a bird and a plane flew over my head and the sky was purple. It felt amazing and forced at the same time. I figure I am experiencing a phase of transition during which performing is both new, scary, tense and full of overthinking and it is also a step in the right direction so it feels liberating, fun, aligned, and dare I say the word 'right'. 

❤ Thank you so much Justin Blaney for hosting a beautiful evening of Art on the Rooftop.
❤Thank you to the joyful & courage artists who stepped in front of the mic [Spence Hood], to the stylish mamas who took the time to put together gorgeous outfits [Heidi / The Rogue Essentials] and [Alisha /], to the big personalities that made me laugh, and to friends who are always there in the crowd winking at me [Nikki / @nikkitarex] [Valerie / La Fonda]. -- LOVE! CHA

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