I cannot go back and live again.
Everything unfolds like the wings of a butterfly.
And old friends are happy to see the new colors.
I love her almost as much as I love you.
I’ve had this dream since I was a child.
And I am searching for solutions.
Light and dark.
What you do not see in the random video clips from my days, is the way I fell in love with a dear old friend, the spaciousness of my spirit when the air and water meet, the peace in my body as rose petals were across my sensitive skin, and the way a piece of me softened to let me forward into a new chapter of life.
We drank banana juice, ate fried rice, enjoyed a couples’ Balinese massage, and played MarioKart outside of Sushimi in Seminyak before going inside to grab little moving plates of sushi. We drank tea and poured secret whispers of our soul; a refreshing treat to lap up in the safety of a well-aged friendship. He gave me someone to hug deeply. We danced a hugging sway on the night street. I rested my head into his shoulder and smiled at his hair, the same as I’ve always known it. He’s wild like a lion. He is still proud. He held me closely and insisted I should consider myself lucky. He is another comfortable human I can share time with. He seems like a human whose time is as free as mine and a human who is excited to become more free beside me. Somehow he helps my voice remember it is a gift and I remember the way I use it is an art. The greatest beauty is possible in the greatest simplicity. Every action and word I offer to the expansion of the this universe is drenched thoroughly to the core in love.
We drop out clothes and jump into the dark pool. I love being naked with people. I love being naked with myself. I love being real. Real not perfect. Real is most comfortable now that I’m used to it.
Love & Double Rainbows,
Cha Wilde
