I close my eyes and see the universe before me, as if I'm standing on the bow of a great starship sailing through black space. My eyes take in the countless stars as we move forward into the unknown so quickly I almost feel as if we're holding still. I am the figurehead of the human ship, all of my brothers and sisters behind me, following along, maybe grateful to not be the ones out front. They can see each other but for me, I only see space. My senses tell me I am alone on this frontier, pushing through particles into nothingness but I find comfort in the knowledge that my people are behind me and we travel together. I am not different, special or unlike them in any way. I feel all their fears and insecurities. If anything, being out here in front intensifies the shaking in my knees. From time to time, I sink back into the crowd for a moments pause but inevitably, their is a call for someone to raise their hand and come forward. So time and again, I lift my trembling fingers into the air and say yes. Someone has to be at the front of the ship, the first to taste the new air, let it be me.
>> This was my visualization as I played live music during Josephine Silverwolf's yoga class this morning. We were at Ignite Yoga Studio in North Bend, the studio is beautiful for it's simplicity; there is no boutique selling t-shirts or even mats for rent. You walk in and your feet kiss a dark wooden floor, swirling with knotted patterns, colorful beaded tapestries hang on the wall, the air feels like a sauna and soft light slides in through the yellow curtains. Josephine's harmonium is beneath the largest tapestry and I place my guitar beside her. The students place themselves one by one, Josephine's soft British accent fills the silences between the notes that begin pouring from my guitar. I slip into moments of meditation with the music and then snap back to the room, distracted, hitting a note in a different key, forgetting the lyrics. I take a deep breath and draw my attention inward again to that empty place where the music flows freely and with my eyelids lowered I return to the bow of the starship. This is not about me. I am not here to impress people. I don't have to be good. I just have to show up and be willing; willing to lead, willing to go first so that others my follow where they've always longed to go...forward into the unknown.
Asking the Universe for My Dream Band
Posted this on Craigslist this week - scary to click publish. Nervous what my friends will think. Did it anyway.
"My name is Cha Wilde. I'm a singer-songwriter in Seattle and I'm on the hunt for female musicians to help me create my first album. I want to create music with like-minded ladies who are self-motivated, driven to accomplish their goals, excited to empower other women, cultivate positivity, invest time in personal growth and use their skills to make the world a better more beautiful place.
I specialize in writing lyrics & melodies and singing. I have intermediate guitar and piano skills that I use for songwriting. I am open to experimenting with any & all musical instruments but I am particularly searching for drums/percussion and strings (guitar/fiddle/cello/violin/piano).
I have a beautiful vision of "Cha and her Band of Wilde Women" -- a circle of women coming together to play with joyful spirits, traveling on tour to perform, speak on this platform and offering workshops and retreats, all to offer our gift of music back to the people as a tool for healing and a celebration of life. We will be performing at festivals, yoga studios & events, spiritual centers, busking on the street and bringing music to places where people least expect it so it can brighten people's days and send out those good vibes.
I have big dreams, a million ideas and the drive to manifest them into reality. Now I'm looking for people who want to jump on this band wagon with me, for the short or long term - either way. We can meet over coffee, try playing together once or twice and see how it goes. No commitment, just putting out my request to the universe to see who answers back. If this speaks to you even in the slightest or you know someone who would be a good fit, please contact me and/or pass this on. Thank you! Cha
**I'm located in Bellevue and I'm happy to meet with ladies anywhere in the Seattle area.*
♡ CONNECT WITH ME ♡
Cha Wilde
↠ Website - https://wildeasfuck.com/
↠ Instagram - https://instagram.com/chawilde
↠ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/chawilde/
↠ Soundcloud - https://soundcloud.com/chawilde
↠ Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1OCqtLudwdx5o3UGeXB3Ew?view_as=subscriber
It's a Good Thing To Feel Uncomfortable with New Experiences Traveling the World
It took me only 30 minutes at the Sh'Bang Music & Arts Festival to wish I could find a way outta there! Three days later, I was crying because I didn't want to leave. It all boiled down to being outside my comfort zone - I was in a new place, with new people, and new music. Everything was overwhelming because I couldn't find anything really familiar to latch onto. Normally, at music festivals, I'm bumping up and down against stranger's bodies, wearing nearly nothing but sparkles and the EDM bass is heavy, lazerlights are zooming overhead, the air is hot and warm, the earth is dusty and the unicorn floaties around bouncing around through the sardine packed crowed. Yah, that's my normal. So when I arrived in the damp chilly Northwest forest, surrounded by open space, cowboys plucking on banjos, hippies wearing earth-tones and pirates teaching me how to dance the Charlston I was a little out of my cozy place. I am really amazed at how quickly I wanted to pull the trigger and leave. I was like, "Cool. Been here, seen it, ready to go!" And my husband was like...ummm let's stay. I think it will be really fun. He was right because I got to see & do so many cool things AND I learned some important lessons:
LESSON ONE: Everything new is uncomfortable at first. Stick around until it becomes familiar and then suddenly you'll be comfortable again. The discomfort is just a sign of newness...not a sign that something is necessarily wrong. The faster you start talking to people, exploring, touching things, learning eagerly like a child about this new environment, the faster your brain will understand it and find it's place.
LESSON TWO: Everything is weird to someone. Festivals of any kind are a gathering of people who have a similar way of how they like to be weird. So drop the judgement and replace it with acceptance. You think they're weird and they think you're weird...so why not be weird together.
LESSON THREE: You need to take a break if you're going to find clarity. I was stressin' about taking another weekend off, another weekend at a festival, another weekend NOT making money. I was stressin' about which path to take in life, what actions to take when I got home. I just wanted to keep figuring it out, journaling and brainstorming. But I was forced to swim around naked with hippies until I finally looked up and noticed birds flying in the trees and saw the texture of the clouds and remembered what it's like to just be alive in the present moment, right here & now. In that present moment, I knew exactly what I need/want to do (create & share music, heal people with music, travel with music...) and I didn't need to 'think about it'. The thinking was only happening because I was trapped in my brain (a messy labyrinth) rather than in the present moment where you can see where you are and what needs to happen next (just like crossing a river from stone to stone....you have to be present to know which step to take next).
LESSON FOUR: I have some deep need to be seen, to be perfect and to be strong. I didn't make any progress beyond these realizations but the fact I became aware of them this weekend is the first step and if I hadn't stuck around for the weekend, who knows if I would have had those self-awareness breakthroughs.
LESSON FIVE (MOST IMPORTANT): Without your health you have nothing. Your experience of the world will be more/less enjoyable depending on your physical health. Everything is going to suck, be uncomfortable, irritating, depressing, not good enough, negative. The two weeks leading up to Sh'Bang I had not taken care of myself. I'd overpartied,, underslept, overeaten, underhydrated, overthought, underexercised, underperformed at work, got totally overwhlemed with life decisions and underprepared for the weekend. I was operating on 3 hours of sleep, a stuff bloated stomach full of sugar and carbs, I didn't pack the right clothes for the festival (I was thinking it was going to be warm and sunny but it was wet and cold and I was literally in my tent alone shivering and swearing about how much I hate the PNW in the winter and I hate everything in life right now and I just want to go to the gorge. ha! I realized that I felt like shit physically, so no wonder I wanted to go home. I wasn't the best version of myself, up for making new friends or handling new experiences. Realizing this, I immediately started fixing this problem. At the festival, I cleaned up my diet, went on runs, meditated, borrowed clothes to stay dry and warm, got as much sleep as I could and practiced positive thinking. By Sunday afternoon I returned home a new woman, excited about my next adventure.
LESSON SIX: People need people. When I wasn't feeling well, I isolated myself and it made everything worse and more uncomfortable because I felt out of place, like I didn't belong with 'those people'. As soon as I started talking to people, making friends, joking around and touching people (dancing, swimming, yoga etc...) I felt connected and a part of the community. It's difficult to feel uncomfortable when you feel like you belong. It's difficult to feel like you don't belong if you're surrounded by friends :) So if you find yourself without friends, go make new ones!
Sh'Bang Music Festival - Skinny Dipping with Hippies, Pirates & Cowboys
Sh'Bang Music & Arts Festival - a land of hippies, pirates, cowboys, vaudeville performers, compost toilets and skinny dipping to live music. I showed up to Lookout Arts Quarry (Bellingham, WA) on Friday and immediately felt miles out of my comfort zone. I actually want to run straight home at the first chance I got but I stayed with faith that good things happen when you leave that silly little comfort zone. And I was right. By the end of the weekend, I was crawling around naked on a floating dock with other people pretending to be wild animals and chanting Om in a dark sauna with dozens of unseen naked bodies. It was a weekend of naked bodies - I probably never saw so many gorgeous boobs in one place in my life. I did have some serious boob envy for a couple hours until my boyfriend..I mean husband (still getting used to it) reassured me that he likes my boobies lots and lots ;)
THE 10 WEIRDEST & COOLEST THINGS I SAW & DID
1) I turned around and saw a naked cowboy with a black hat and whip, doing a handstand on a raft and then jumping into the water with a yeehaaw!
2) I ate two giant gluten free raw-as-fuck hippie friendly cookies in the biggest hammock I've ever seen (it could hold more than 10 people) up high in the forest trees and watched a soap box derby race downhill into a wall of foaming bubbles.
3) I watched an old man so high on drugs he was in a different solar system having conversations with folding chairs.
4) I met a wolf who didn't give a shit about being pet but walked around like he owned the place. So awesome to stand with a wild animal (clearly wild even though he has a human friend).
5) I heard a man singing incredible karaoke (love ballads) by himself at 430am for at least 2 hours straight for two (maybe three) nights in a row.
6) I saw kids and adults running around on all fours with horse heads on chasing each other.
7) I made friends with a gorgeous mermaid sitting on a pirate ship (her mermaid tail was custom made in Florida by The Mertailor (cost over $1000 and felt like real rubbery fish tail). She said "Life is about doing what you want. So if you want to be a fucking mermaid, be a fucking mermaid." #preach!
8) I discovered a car in a forest clearly that was covered in kids happy meal toys and spewing bubbles out the back.
9) I ate freshly fried donuts while watching men strip in a burlesque show and then passionately make-out with each other on stage...one was a cowboy and the other some kind of lumberjack.
10) I took a rhythmic yoga class that made us touch strangers with our eyes closed (made us feel like instant friends) and then lock eye contact with strangers (also made us feel like instant friends) while primal crawling on the floating dock, naked, while listening to a woman singing about the wild wild west, while an artist painted live on stage and kids paddle-boarded and jumped off the diving board and people gave each other massages, and we all soaked in the sun as one beautiful human tribe, all differences aside. Some say crazy...I say human. // cha
Badger Medicine Tells Me It's Time to Go After My Dreams More Aggressively
I have this big dream of singing at the gorge and all day everyday it's on my mind. I don't watch TV anymore because I'm practicing music instead. I've stopped working on Mondays & Fridays to devote those days to music (which is a big blow on the bank account). I've started performing live music in yoga classes and I'm regularly posting videos (music & vlogs) online. And yet, it's just not enough. I know I'm still holding back because I'm afraid to take the next big steps on my journey. I'm taking lots of baby steps that are moving me inches forward but I'm starting to feel self-conscious about now take bigger leaps & bounds.
Some things I feel like I SHOULD be doing: performing open mics, busking, gigs, festivals, shows, more LIVE social media videos, out reach to other musicians, more instrument practice, more pushing to get my music heard by other people, more recording (especially more polished recording, like actually finishing tracks so they are complete with all instruments and ready to be played on the radio and performed live with a band), finding musicians to record or perform with, taking music lesson (guitar, voice and piano) and the list goes on. There are so many things I can do and so much of it is unknown that it's hard to step forward. All the baby steps I'm taking are within my comfort zone - things I'm familiar with such as making music videos, performing in yoga classes and vlogging.
I'm making progress but I'm not pushing as far out of my comfort zone as I know I can and need to if I'm going to see the results I want. It feels like a batter between keeping it comfortable enough that I keep going and don't scare myself away and pushing outside the comfort zone enough that I feel inspired by the magic that happens out there.
When I was at Sh'Bang Music & Arts Festival, I drew a card out of a Native American Medicine Card Deck...it was THE BADGER. At first I wasn't impressed...it's not exactly a sexy or sparkly animal (what I usually go for) but as I read this description in the book, I was like HELLS YES I'M A BADGER:
"Badger's medicine is aggressiveness & the willingness to fight for what it wants...Badger is the medicine of many powerful medicine women...you are quick to express your feelings, and you do not care what the consequences are...Badger medicine healers have the courage to use unconventional means to exact a cure...people with Badger medicine will be aggressive enough to make it to the tops of their chosen fields, because they do not give up. They are the finest healers because they use any and all means to ensure healing...A Badger person is often the 'boss' and the one everyone fears. Badger gets the job accomplished. Badger's certainty is a source of strength....
...If Badger pushed its way into your cards today, it may be telling you that you have been too meek in trying to reach some goal. Badger asks you how long you are willing to sit and wait for the world to deliver your silver spoon. In this medicine, the key is to become aggressive enough to do something about your present state of affairs. Badger is teaching you to get angry in a creative way and say, "I won't take it anymore....Badger may be signalling a time when you can use your healing abilities to push ahead in life. Heal yourself by aggressively removing the barriers that don't 'grow corn.'...use Badger's aggression to seek new levels of expression..."
So I guess I need to get a move on then ;) Thanks Badger // cha
How to Make Your Dreams a Reality with Daily Goals - Interview with Karli Lindor
A little tripod, a smartphone camera and two yoga ladies talking on a dock in Lake Sammamish, sounds like a perfect spot to talk about dreams & goals to me! This week I performed live music during Karli Lindor's lakeside yoga class at sunset and I arrived early so we could take 30 minutes to video ourselves sharing our dreams, and discussing how we're making them a reality. What is the difference between goals & dreams? How do you figure out your dream? What do you do when the path towards your dreams becomes overwhelming and you want to stop? In this blog post, you'll find the entire transcript of our conversation, including my favorite quotes, time-stamps to help you navigate through the video, Karli's morning ritual routine, a couple book recommendations & the difference between believing in a magic pill vs believing in yourself! Here we go!
TRANSCRIPT
0:00 | INTRO
Following dreams and pursuing goals have become such a huge obsession in my life, it has guided the lifestyle that I've created for myself and I after a couple years of hiding in a cave (figuratively) figuring out what I want to do with my life and how I'm going to go after it, I'm excited to start talking to other people about their dreams and goals and how they're putting it into action and changing their lives. What do all the dream chasers have in common and what are they doing differently based on their specific dreams? What are the universal commonalities in beliefs & practices of people who are going after their dreams? What are the daily actions we take to manifest our dreams into reality?
1:00 | FIGURING OUT YOUR DREAM
"You have to plan on going away for a couple years, and getting really focused on what you love, on what is important to you and driving it." (Karli) If you're not clear about what you dream is, you can't drive it. Even an idea of what you want isn't good enough. You have to be super specific on what your dream is so you know exactly what actions you need to take. As yoga teachers, we have an over arching theme of being excited to help people. Karli focuses in on the health & fitness aspect and Cha focuses in on the creativity and musical side but we share a similar intention. You have to figure out which specific lane you want to go down.
2:44 | OUR DREAM PATHS & HOW WE GOT TO WHERE WE ARE TODAY
"You learn by going down the wrong path and figuring out how to get back onto the right one." (Karli) "Or going down the right path until it's not the right path anymore and then you switch." (Cha) "And being able to be okay to switch instead of driving yourself into the wall." (Karli)
CHA'S STORY | A couple years ago I was passionately teaching yoga full time (15 classes a week) and gradually my passion faded and I showed up to class without any stories to tell, no inspiration to offer. I realized the only part of the class I was actually excited about what the very end when I would sing to my students in Savasana. I finally accepted that I was really just excited about the music and everything else was in my way. I needed to start steering directly to music.
KARLI'S STORY | Karli was also teaching yoga full time (15 classes a week) and she realized that she had greater potential for helping more people 'outside the walls' of the yoga studio. So she changed direction and started coaching fitness online. Instead of spending most of her day driving around alone in her car between yoga studios (not the yoga teacher dream she'd imagined) she was now connecting with people all day long through social media and her fitness groups so she could help them in their everyday life. Karli started building her social media platform, driven by her desire to have relationships with people and connect with them.
OUR TIP FOR FIGURING OUT YOUR DREAM PATH | To figure out your dream, listen to the feedback you get from other people. What are you doing that is resonating with people? Only add in things that are going to serve you. Instead of focusing on making money, focus on what you're excited about and where the creativity is flowing! Look for the theme, the common thread, the thing that you're still excited about, to help you figure out what direction you're supposed to head in.
07:31 | "You gotta keep focused on I'm here to serve people, I'm here to help people outside of the classroom; that's why I need to build this platform or that's why you need to pursue music, you want to inspire people on that creative side, you know, what really speaks to the. You know people love you because of your music and your talent and people love me because of my ability to connect with them and help them on a holistic level not just in a fitness class."
08:55 | DO YOU THINK THERE'S A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GOALS & DREAMS?
"Yah! Goals you work at everyday, dreams are in your head. For me, I always had the dream to be an entrepreneur, I always had the dream to be able to travel and do whatever I wanted, I always had the dream to not have to go into a corporate job and sit in a cubicle but none of that started happening until I put goals in front of me. I set daily goals, weekly goals, monthly goals and yearly goals. I always my clients, [set a goal, write it down & tape it on your mirror. Place it somewhere where you're reminded of it every single day.] Goals really encourage you to take action and do the small things verses dreams are overarching and it's really easy to be like "that's my dream one day" but goals make you put it into action every minute of every day and that's where the change occurs.
09:52 | KARLI'S DREAM + GOALS
DREAMS | "I think it changes everyday." (Karli) Giving myself freedom to travel and do yoga teacher trainings while still coaching. Owning my own house one day, maybe on a lake, being able to pour into others while giving myself space to grow; to be able to provide for her own family what her mom & dad provided for her, having a family grow up by the water. "[When I say I want to live by a lake, it's so much more than the lake. It's the family that I want to provide for.] Dreams seem so far away so you have to pull back and focus on the daily goals that are going to get you there." (Karli)
GOALS | Growth of my team & my clients, doing my miracle mornings which include meditation, devotional, yoga practice, workout, little things where I create a structure, choosing to get up a 5am daily and do the little things and showing up on those days continuously
11:10 | WHAT RESULTS HAVE YOU SEEN FROM YOUR GOALS? HOW ARE THEY MOVING YOU TOWARDS YOUR DREAM?
"Slowly. The ability to do the little things that you don't think matter but doing those little things daily do matter because they add up. Five minutes of meditation a day isn't going to change your life in two days. Five minutes of a meditation everyday for 365 days you could become a totally different person. But people see that 5 minute meditation in a 24 hour timeslot and they're like "it's just five minutes, I'll do it tomorrow" but you need to place more importance on those little things."
KARLI'S TIP FOR FOLLOWING GOALS | Break your dream down into small little goals and know that doing those small little goals will add up overtime. It is easier when you break it down but you have to start believing in the compound effect.
"You have to believe in the fact that these little things that you're doing everyday, eventually will compound. But the momentum starts so slow. It's like building the social media platforms. So slow!" (Karli)
KARLI'S MORNING ROUTINE (THE DAILY GOALS)
5am Wakeup
Light a Candle
Braindump in Journal
5 Minute Meditation (she likes doing a guided one on her phone)
10 Minutes of Personal Develop Reading
A Little Bit of Work, Connecting with Her Team
6am Virtual Workout with her Team Online "Press Play"
Celebrate with Coffee!
Worship Music
The Rest of the Day Is Chaos 2hr - 12hrs of Work
There is less conversation around a dream. It's harder to explain to other people. We don't always understand where it comes from or why we want it but we can explain our goals. Goals are more linear, taking you from one point to the next. The dream can be anything.
15:55 | REMEMBER TO REFLECT BACK ON THE GOALS YOU'VE ACCOMPLISHED ALREADY
Remember to look back at where you've come from and appreciate how many dreams you've already realized! You can think about your dreams as the horizon line on the ocean. Your goal is to keep the boat going forward, and the dream is the destination. But the horizon is always moving away from you. The dream is always changing because as you move closer to one dream, it becomes more realized, more normal, and you'll be ready to move onto the next one, on to a bigger dream that builds on the one that came before.
"Your dream is never definite. It's always infinite and it changes as you change." (Karli)
"Dreams are more out of your control. Goals are 'here's what am I going to do daily to make this happen' whereas the dream is 'I don't know why I want this, this is just important to me'. Maybe you can explain it but not having to explain it." (Cha)
"WHY do you get up at 5am. If it was just to make money I probably wouldn't do it. I has to be rooted in something that is so much bigger than myself. But your dream, singing at the Gorge or whatever it is, that will get you out of bed in the mornings. That will make you work that extra hour at night instead of watching Netflix. What propels you forward into doing those little small things that kind of suck sometimes." (Karli)
20:40 | KARLI'S INSTAGRAM ADVICE:
"I don't always feel like waking up and posting on Instagram but I do it anyway...Consistency is definitely key for me and just sharing your story and be really really raw...I talk about my goals and I talk about my dreams and dreams are the heartstring stuff and it always pulls on people so much easier. People just connect with that. Even though they might have no idea what you're talking about they can feel your emotion. For me I'm always like, 'no one's going to understand this' but then they do. People pick up in between the lines."
21:27 | CHASING YOUR DREAMS CHANGES WHO YOU ARE
"Going after your dreams forces you to become a new version of yourself...If someone call me tonight and asked me to sing at the Gorge tomorrow I would obviously say yes, but it wouldn't be satisfying. It's not just that I want to sing on that stage, it's that I want to become the woman who got to that stage. Who I am today is in the past and the person that walks onto the stage, however long it takes, has exponentially high music skill than I do, has connections, has overcome fears and obstacles." (Cha) "It's so much more about the journey." (Karli) "It really is, because stepping on that stage, what makes it exciting is to step onto it and be like, "I did all that" (Cha) "I got there, by my own work, by showing up in those goals and those days when it was hard." (Karli) "It's not just the hardwork but what it did to me. When you have the discipline, when you have to face your fears, it turns you into a stronger person...outside of music, now I can handle other things. I envision that have to become the best version of myself to be able to accomplish that dream, because I have to become everything that is demanded of me." (Cha)
"You're never at the point where you're done, where you've made it. Have fun on the journey. That's what's really going to inspire you and encourage you to continue moving forward. And those days that you look back on are going to be the fun days....You have to learn to love yourself in the days that build up to it because that's where you find the most character. That's where you really find out things about yourself." (Karli)
23:45 | INSPIRE PEOPLE TO FOLLOW THEIR DREAMS
"There are lots of goals, people losing weight everywhere, but how often do you run into people that are like "I'm following my dream! And a lot of times, people have given up on their dreams and that's where we see bitterness come in....People discourage others from following their dreams when they're not following theirs." (Cha)
"We need to be reminded that it's hard...If it was easy, everyone would be doing it. Hello! It's supposed to be hard. It's supposed to be really really hard." (Karli)
"How can we remember that it's hard but at the same time, how can we get more people to do it?" (Cha) "It has a lot to do with self belief. People put a lot of limiting beliefs on themselves, we listen to the media, and we listen to 'go to college, graduate, go to a corporate job', if I listened to what everyone told me to do, I would be working at Starbucks corporate living in an apartment in downtown Seattle and designing coffee mugs; which would be awesome, I love coffee but I don't love it that much and I love what I'm doing now way more. You know, the amount of people who told me don't do it, don't move into that tinyhome in a mobile home park, don't do that. I'm living that dream because I decided to set those limiting beliefs that I had of myself and people had of me and my choices aside...And knowing that there is so much room for growth. There is so much room for people to follow their dreams because most people don't. There is so much opportunity for the people that do want to follow their dreams to follow them and succeed and hit those goals because most people fail. And sit with that and realize that it's actually really cool that most people don't follow their dreams because that gives me more room for success. Which isn't selfish, just know you're able to go after whatever you want to do because most people won't do it...A lot of people start but not a lot of people finish. All you have to do is show up and work harder. You don't have to be any more talented. You don't have to be any more special. You just have to be that person that doesn't quit. Stop looking at it like you need this magic potion. People think they're not qualified enough but no, you just have to have belief. You just have to work hard."
"You have to start, you have to keep going, you have to finish and when other people don't, that's when you do." (Cha) "It's such a simple recipe and people think that there's these magic pills and it's like NO, you just have to keep going when everybody else doesn't or everybody else tells you not to." (Karli)
28:05 | THE MAGIC PILL VS SELF BELIEF
"Everyone thinks it's a magic pill. There's the diet and there's the workout and that's only 20%. The other 80% is you believing that it's actually going to work. It can be the best weight loss solution, it can be the best diet plan ever but none of that is going to work if you don't believe in yourself that it's going to work and you don't put it into action. 80% of it is about your beliefs, and are you actually going to show up and are you actually going to do it?" (Karli)
28: 35 | WHAT HELPS YOU KEEP GOING AND BELIEVE IN YOURSELF
"Personal develop, diving into stuff that's going to encourage me and learning from people that have already done it...Diving into things, you're never there. You never know everything. Setting your ego aside and learning more." (Karli)
FOLLOW KARLI
Karli Lindor
Yoga Teacher + Virtual Fitness Coach with Team Beachbody
Instagram: @karlindor
Facebook: Karli Lindor
MENTIONS
1) Shakti Vinyasa Yoga
2) The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson [Book]
3) Big Magic by Liz Gilbert [Book]
Delightful - A Song for Charmaine Olivia & Artists Who Feel Vulnerable
I've been following Charmaine Olivia's artwork on Instagram for years and a couple weeks ago she posted about how vulnerable it feels sometimes to share your artwork with the world...and yet it's also a magical wonderful feeling that in her words is "wildly exhilarating." I related to everything she said and a wave of inspiration flew over me and delivered a song in my lap. The entire time I was writing the song, I was staring at her painting and using her caption as inspiration for the lyrics. So from one artist to another, here is my new song, "Delightful" for Charmaine Olivia. You can listen to the audio on Soundcloud or watch the video on Youtube. The first half of the video is my story / commentary and I start singing at 2:35.
Channeling Strength Through My Music as a Gift for Those Who Need It
"What do you want to work on for the rest of the year?" One by one, the yoga students shared:
ACCEPTANCE OF WHAT IS
PATIENCE WHILE I WORK TOWARDS MY GOALS
BEING LESS SHY - ESPECIALLY ABOUT MY ENGLISH (AS A SECOND LANGUAGE)
IT'S BEEN TWO YEARS SINCE MY WIFE DIED, AND NOW IT'S TIME FOR ME TO GET BACK TO A NORMAL LIFE
FLEXIBILITY & BALANCE
GET DISTRACTIONS OUT OF MY MIND
MOVE TO THE FRONT OF THE CLASS
JUST PRACTICE, THE REST IS COMING
JUST SHOW UP (my answer)
Emily (my sweet friend and today's yoga teacher calls out instructions), the students start moving their bodies, and my shaky hand reaches for my guitar. How the fuck do I start? I have no plan, just a rough list of songs to choose from. How do I take this room from silence to music - my voice has to break through that sound barrier. Croak....I'll just wait. I wait for them to do their initial warm up stretches, sip my lemon water, breath deep, feel the quiet guitar in my lap and take another deep breath. The fear voices start whispering in my ear again -- what if you hit an ugly chord? what if someone here doesn't like your voice and they find it annoying during their practice? what if Emily is disappointed that it's not as good as she was hoping for in her class etc..
MY INNER MONOLOGUE WHILE PERFORMING
I remind myself, the only way out is through. The only way to start the singing is to, well, START. So I pick a random string and pluck - nervous I'll be too quiet or too loud. Oh god here we go. I remind myself over and over, close your eyes, playing music is just another form of meditation, focus on what I'm doing, really listen to every sound I'm making and forget about the other people in the room. This thinking propels me forward and I'm excited to hear how pretty my voice sounds. It's going well. I look up and see someone smiling - I wonder if they're smiling because of the music or something else...woops my attention slipped and now I'm off beat. Focus back in Cha! Listen to the music that is coming out through you. Okay, we're back on...oh that was a nice note...I wonder if anyone is looking at me, if I open my eyes I'll see, NO, keep focused, listen to yourself, sway with the rhythm, you got this, let go, all you have to do is show up. It's not your job to be good. Your only job is to show up.
As the energy in the room lifts, I start to realize the power I hold in my lap. The students are holding a challenging yoga pose, I make the music louder, faster, more empowering. I hope the noise I'm making in the corner might give them some extra strength to endure the physical strain. I looked at the girl who said she was "working on being less shy" and I image the music flying out of my guitar is invisible medicine for her, musical courage that will give her all the confidence she needs. My entire life I've always drawn strength from certain songs - music in my spiritual toolbox that I pull out when I need that boost. [I've been starting my day with 'Watch Me Shine' by Joanna Pacitti from the Legally Blonde soundtrack since I was in high school. It charges me up with self-belief and go-get-em attitude.] Maybe if I can let go enough, whatever power is in my music will make its way out and give someone else strength. Could my music really do that?
My eyes flick across the room, stopping on each person, remembering what they shared with the group - that piece of them that is most dear and vulnerable. Seeing their vulnerability gives me more strength of my own because I want to be strong for them. I do my inexperienced best to infuse my strength into my music so it can fly to each of them, like a carrier pigeon, delivering that strength to their hearts through their ears. Whenever my strength wavers, I put myself in their shoes. I'm the student on the mat and there is a musician in the corner feeling nervous. I want her to be confident and sing louder. Id hope my yoga practice will push positive energy into the room that will give her strength to sing wholeheartedly.
You see, we all want to see each other succeed and I believe the best way we can help each other is by showing up and being completely who we are, as we are in the moment. It's not about being good enough. It's about showing up. People are so grateful when you just show up. // Cha
PS: My biggest insecurity for the performance was my guitar skills (I'm pretty hard on myself with guitar) and guess what... I showed up and did my best and after my performance a lady came up and asked me if I teach guitar lessons and if I'd be game to teach her teenage daughter!! Whaaaaatt??? Ironic how my biggest compliment was like medicine for my biggest insecurity today. Just show up people, just show up.
[Yoga Class at Shakti Vinyasa East in Bellevue, WA]
How I Create a Positive Mindset When Facing Fear
I'm about to do something new for the first time and I'm nervous and my brain is rollin' out the negative thoughts. This is how I'm taking control of my mind so I can convert negative nervous self doubt into positive excited self belief!
1) DELETE + CONVERT
I catch myself thinking something negative or unhelpful and I click my imaginary DELETE button. For real, I actually visualize the thought as words written out in a sentence and then I visualize myself clicking delete or erasing those words so my brain is blank and then I think new thoughts to fill their place. I usually go for the exactly opposite. If the negative thought was, "What if someone is better at music than I am and they hear all my mistakes and judge me?" then I delete it and replace it with, "I hope there is someone in the room who is better at music than me and they'll be excited to see another music growing and they'll come introduce themselves to me afterwards and we'll end up being friends and we'll help each other grow!" Sooo much cooler right? Suddenly, it's not only positive, it's hopeful and empowering!
VIDEO [PART 1]
All the fear-talk going on in my head this morning before I perform LIVE music for a yoga class for the first time.
2) REWIRE
I visualize how I want to feel. If I were the version of myself that I want to be, what kinds of thoughts would I have? What feelings would I experience? What actions would I take? How does the best or ideal version of myself experience and interact with life differently. Since I'm in control of my thoughts, feelings and actions I can then implement that new lifestyle. I'm teaching my brain & body to function in a new way so I can get different results and start to see my present reality shift to match what I've been dreaming of. Learn how to change who you are to achieve your dreams.
VIDEO [PART 2]
My mental tricks for converting my brain from negative self talk into positive empowering excitement.
3) PERSPECTIVE
I imagine myself way in the future, in a reality where my current dreams have become my standard and whatever I'm nervous about today has fallen so far into the past it's no longer a big deal and more importantly, whatever I'm nervous about today is an important part of the journey. I can see where I am on the map. I'm not just lost in space feeling scared. I'm at the beginning of projectile journey across space. Today I'm nervous because it's my first time performing live music for a yoga class. In a couple years, I'll be walking on stage at the big Wanderlust Yoga Festival as a headliner musician and today's little yoga studio performance will be relatively 'cute' by comparison. I'll look back on today with fondness for where I started. Today is small but necessary and because it's part of the journey, it's just as important. Now I see it all in perspective...every experience is a stepping stone across the river!
VIDEO [PART 3]
How positive future visualization puts it all into perspective!
You Are a Fisherman of Ideas and Your Greatest Ideas Will Fight the Hardest Against Your Line
So I have an idea.... These are probably my favorite words. The hold so much vulnerability, excitement, unknown and hope. They are the source of everything wonderful that humans have ever done and the very essence of what makes us human in the first place. Ideas are what greet you when your eyes peel open in the morning. And like fisherman of creativity, we can cast our lines and reel in the great ones. And on that note, the great ideas are the ones that wriggle and squirm and try to get away and pull at you but you keep trying, you insist on pulling them to shore. The great ideas, like the great fish, are the not the easy ones. So when you hear yourself exclaiming, "I have an idea!!", relish in that beautiful moment of enthusiasm and prepare yourself, root your feet into the ground and scan the horizon with your eyes. If it's a simple fun idea, the current will pick up, like will get busy, and the idea will slip away with your enthusiasm. But when you catch a great idea, an idea that has a life of it's own, an idea that is greater than you, the moment the current picks up, you'll start to feel the tug on your line. The thrashing may begin and your chest may tighten. The enthusiasm (that electric spark in your heart) may be replaced by a solid determination to hold tighter. The great ideas, the ones worth hauling on board, will put up a fight...but you will fighter harder. And because you are human, you will win. Your beautiful innovative brain will step up to the plate and do what it does best...problem solve, invent tools, imagine and manifest something new into creation and suddenly you will exclaim, "I have done it!" // Cha
Let Excitement Guide Your Life Choices and Don't Let Anyone Squash Your Enthusiasm
I'm sitting at a little wooden table outside Juicebox Cafe (12th Street on Capital Hill, Seattle) and the warm wind is blowing across my skin...the summer is about to leave. Jessica just left; we met to discuss how I can teach photo/video/self-esteem/empowerment workshops for the girls at her organization, Young Women Empowered. I'm feeling high on cloud nine; seeing my dreams blossoming before my eyes and then...my husband calls and I immediately feel a need to dull down my enthusiasm, fearful I'll appear flightly, inconsistent, impressionable, wishy-washy. I feel so excited & proud coming home and reporting on how my business is performing, new clients, new sales, grow grow grow gold star. He gives me a high five and I'm beaming knowing that my husband is proud of me and approving of what I'm doing.
But here I am cowering about telling him my fresh flash of inspiration - a blossoming dream of using my music as a platform to empower others to chase their dreams too. I can blog, podcast, vlog, do workshops, retreats, write books, whatever.... I'm just learning so much as I pursue my dream that I now have lots of share that apparently (according to Jessica who was raving about how helpful everything I was saying is for her) people are hungry to hear (and I'm ecstatic to share...like SERIOUSLY I haven't been so excited since the last time I was on fire for a big dream).
I'm singing my dreams boldly down the streets of Seattle, but the moment I hear my husband's voice in the phone, my own voice drops quieter and I play it down. Instead of screaming "I'm so excited, I'm going to change the world!!!", I hushly mutter "Yah, so I'm thinking of doing that blog that could help some people." He says, "Okay" and his voice is totally neutral and my confidence trips.
I catch myself....I'm assuming he isn't 100% on board. I know he can't and won't stop me. He'll always encourage me to do whatever I want, but I'm not seeing the natural enthusiasm bubbling out of him. Maybe it's because when I tell him about business, he gets the numbers game but when I'm talking about the warm fuzzy feelings of women chasing their dreams, he's not exactly feeling the OMG-wave-your-hands-in-the-air-and-squeal vibe.
The real point of my story though is MY reaction. All he said was 'okay' and who knows what he was thinking - he was at work and he could be keeping his voice down but be super excited for me on the inside. The point that concerns me is that at the first sign of neutrality, I jumped to conclusions and fearfully assumed I was being judged, discouraged or not believed in. Clearly, my own mind is still fragile and sensitive to even the tiniest of ripples in the water. So after we say goodbye, I return myself immediately to this present moment - the wind on my silk blouse, the funky city guy eating his salad across the sidewalk and the girl walking by with pink headphones. Seattle is beautiful right now. The summer is pregnant with potential and my soul is waking up to its deepest calling, a call to play in the wild and magical unknown.
When I was 18, about to head off to college, I promised myself that I would make all my life decisions moving forward based on one criteria.... What are you excited about? Do that. So that's how I chose which classes to take in college. Forget planning a career! I believe that if every decision is made with the wise guidance of excitement and joy then BOOM we're golden and the pathway that unfolds will be spectacular and extraordinary. So here we go...the Cha Wilde lifestyle, wherever my intuition will lead me. Stay excited. Make no assumptions, unless they're positive. Come back to the present moment that is so ripe with beauty and raise the vibrations again. You can't be squished if you keep springing back to life. And smile....big smiles. If you're not smiling...get out fast and race to wherever or whatever brings that smile back! :D // Cha
What's In Your Beyonce Cup? - How to Become Your Ideal Self
Imagine your ideal life, your ideal version of yourself. What does it look like...all of it. You have to visualize ALL of it because your life is one tapestry - everything woven together to create the masterpiece that is you. Change one thing and it's like pulling a threat that will send tension throughout the entire system. If you want to lose 20 pounds, other things are going to change (not just your body). You are going to become a new person, a person who eats different food, moves their body different, has a different schedule that now includes more activity, new clothing, new sexual partners or sexual behavior, new levels of confidence and attitude which will affect how you perform and what you do for fun. I know all about this because from 2015-2017 I lost 25 something pounds. Everything must change because we humans are all one....our atoms are all connected [breaking the habit link].
Okay, so now again....imagine your ideal life, your ideal self. Who do you want to become? My friend Nikki & I call this our "Beyonce Cup". We were at coffee one Sunday morning (a regular routine for us) and we pushed the little empty latte cup into the middle off the table and said, "Everything you hope and dream for yourself. What does that look like? Imagine it could all fit into this cup. What would be in there?"
My answer.... I can do whatever I want and I know it and I do it. My dream is to perform at the Gorge Ampitheater but it's not the actual stage that matters, it's WHO I WILL BE when that moment arrives. I will be a totally different woman - a woman who has earned that moment through hard work, gaining skills, networking, facing fears, and building confidence. I want to wake up in the morning and feel the power of self-love, self-belief and the peace and thrill of knowing that I can experience whatever I want to in this life. I'm using the dream of performing at the Gorge as my compass to direct my growth so that one day, I will be that woman...the ideal version of myself because I have to become her if I'm going to manifest that dream. What's in your Beyonce cup? // Cha
