I started sharing everything (except for the super secret special things that are moments just for me). All the other stuff though, I just pushed it out there. Keeping it locked inside me was pushing me around too much. I hate being pushed around on the inside. The voices in my head do make me crazy. I let them out and speak them into the air at the right moment and time to the right people in the right place. I speak and they leave me. Suddenly, I’m empty and there is only one voice left. The quiet voice that tells me what to do and I agree. It’s not pushing me to do anything or be different. It’s not convincing me I’m okay or pep talking me. It’s just here with me. We’re just groovy together. All striving ceases. Impressing people, silly now. Racing to keep up, needless. Proving myself, why? What she thinks today will be different tomorrow. What she sells me today, I sold yesterday. Enough of the bullshit. I’m just open now and it all flows through like the rivers from the mountains into the mighty ocean where I plunge when I leap from the cliffs. Fear calls me forward and when I go, we’re groovy. We’re groovy; floating naked in the cool water, adventure in my lungs. I’ve stripped myself down and I like myself raw like this, exposed to the elements for all to see. It’s just me and the trees staring up the stars as they stare down at us. Even with all the eyes on me, I know I am alone forever in this body and frankly, I like it better out here. I’m skinny dipping in life, in this universe I am. No more clothes to cover my soul. Everything knocking on my mind may enter and exit. Let it flow, babe. I’m just here, bobbing on the surface, staring at the clouds. I love the blue sky, don’t you? What a day to be alive and leave it at that!
SHE LOVES HER QUIRKY MAGIC
SHE LOVES HER QUIRKY MAGIC
“I grew up with really frizzy hair.
I always felt really ugly.
I would plan my days around my hair.
I was wasting so much time caring about myself hair and it didn’t even matter.
I had friends but for some reason I still had never accepted myself.
This is who I am.
There’s only one you and it’s beautiful. You’re amazing. You were made perfectly the way you were made to be made.
This world is so magical and when people listen to my music I want them to feel that magical feeling and I hope the people in the community that my music brings in feel accepted by everyone.”
— The Friz @thefrizofficial
This woman was inspired by my friend and fellow magical female musical producer “The Friz”.
Listen to our full conversation on The Cha Wilde Show (episode 95)
We’re talking about soul callings and waking up every morning obsessed with music.
Flowerz by The Friz (Original Song)
@thefrizofficial on Instagram
SHE TRUSTS HERSELF
SHE TRUSTS HERSELF
You know what you want. Yes, you do. Confused? Sure. Overwhelmed? Sure. So many options. I understand. How to decide? Stop thinking. Thinking isn’t going to give you an answer, not one you love, not one that satisfies you to the core of your being. You can’t hear yourself when you’re thinking. Too many voices, right?
Pour your coffee. Stare out the window.
Sit with me. Close your eyes. Let’s feel your answer. Wriggly, hard to sit still. I know. Don’t worry.
Who has the answer you’re looking for? Where is it? What are you longing to hear? What if I leaned in and whispered into your ear, right now, the answer you’ve been waiting for, the answer to your askings, desires, longings, strivings? As the coin flips in the air, you know if you want heads or tails. As the air leaves my lips, you know the words you want to hear. Listen to the answer that rises up from below. Listen to your wisdom that sits, steady in your deepness, the quiet seat of your soul.
The definition of trust is “to believe in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of”. Do you believe in your ability to know what you want? Do you believe in your strength to make your dreams a reality? Do you believe the quiet whisper that only you can hear is the truth for you? Have you been giving yourself the opportunity to be reliable? Reliable for others, sure, that’s almost easier, isn’t it? What about reliable to the little one inside of you, the little one who looked up at the sky and saw dinosaurs and ice cream cones, the little one who wanted to fly to the stars, the little one who wanted to save all the polar bears, the little one who wanted to wear a cape every day forever? Can that little one rely on you? Perhaps, it’s time for you to smile down into your being and sense the truth that has been with you all along. How sweet does trust feel?
If you give yourself only one thing, give yourself trust. Look yourself dead in the heart.
Step boldly into truth. You know what you want.
I LOVE YOU
CHA 🍍 WILDE
SHE SITS HERE SILENTLY
SHE SITS HERE SILENTLY
You can run around and achieve all sorts of things right now, busy busy, buzz buzz, stay distracted, stay addicted, stay productive. Get informed and get involved! Keep up and don’t fall behind. Find a way, figure it out, keep pushing, hustle hustle baby. Oh yes, the encouragement of the money makers, how shiny! Can you hear the stress heads calling for your company? There they go on the desperate race from death towards meaning. Are they wrong? No. None of us are wrong. Right? Do you know you are right? Your rightness is validated by your results. Did it work? Are you creating what you want right now? Is this busy work getting you to the top of your mountain? Noise invades from every direction. Ears aching, mind static, tension bleeds into our body. Losing control, we are overtaken by the voices, clicking, clanging, barking. All I want is a peaceful life. Give me silence or a pair of Bose headsets, anything so I can escape this chaos.
Close your eyes and explore the celestial landscape of your inner world. Breathe in...deeper, deeper, deeper, stretch your lungs. Do you feel the space you just created inside? It feels good, doesn’t it? What an expansive universe of sparkling delight you hold inside. Are you ready to stop stretching your fingers outside in the thin wispy emptiness? Plunge them into the warm gooey. Yes, down there in the dark spaces. Maybe it’s been a while since you’ve been here, traveling deep into the soul caverns. Hairs may stand up when you come close to the twistiest corners. Make friends with them slowly. Your heart may sigh upon the rolling vistas. Gaze as long as you like. It’s okay. You’re always welcome here, for a lifetime and beyond.
Many years ago, a meditation teacher instructed me. “Don’t just do something, sit there.” He laughed of course and today I grin as I pass this wisdom on to you. The world will shout at your sweetness and depth, nagging you to get up and do something fast. “Don’t just sit there!” you’ll hear the voices yell. But from now on, when you close your eyes, you can us whisper, “Sit there, beautiful one. Enjoy your being.”
I LOVE YOU
CHA 🍍 WILDE
TAKE HER WITH YOU
SHE BRINGS LIGHT FROM THE WILDE
SHE BRINGS LIGHT FROM THE WILDE
Another Zoom call. You’ll see me sitting in my parent’s bedroom, criss cross on the floor, my cup of tea slowly growing cold as I smile and nod. A face appears on my screen. It’s my dear friend, Sarah Sue. She’s sitting in her Jeep. Quarantine has both of us in corners, crafting an ounce of privacy for this twenty-first century conversation. Her hair is growing out. She shaved her head last summer and now look at those curls coming back. Isn’t it beautiful watching our friends change. I’ve watched her become a mom. As we speak, I know her baby and her husband are up in their tiny apartment in Bellingham, WA. For one hour, I have her all to myself. We’re talking about what it means to have a ‘soul calling’. Sarah Sue is a medicine woman, a fire fighter in the forest, a herbalist, an old soul, a mama who listens closely to her child’s teachings and a friend who guides me back to the wilderness. In the middle of my panic attack, she says, “Go climb a mountain,” and she’s right. I find my freedom at the summit. This woman senses the darkness, walks straight into the most wilde fire and back to her tribe she carries the light. Speak Sarah Sue. What is on your heart?
“I don’t have time or energy for angry activism. Fuck that shit. And really, who’s going to listen to an angry activist? That’s not healthy supportive communication. We’ve got to stop all this violent communication because that’s not how we see results. Honestly, when we’re not living sustainably we’re also making ourselves chronically ill. I wouldn’t be here today if it wasn’t for the support I had from nature. The way that we were headed before this pandemic, climate change was terrifying, especially having a two year old son. I was so overwhelmed and intimidated by it during quarantine and the part that finally was enough to drive me forward was that I have to do this now. Before, it wasn’t relevant but I have to do this. I want to create light. I want to create light that counters all the fear and heaviness of this time. I want to create an opportunity for us to get together and empower people to learn how to protect themselves, how to take care of themselves and inspire themselves to be better people. A big part of my soul purpose is to be a speaker for those who don’t have voices; a speaker for the trees like the Lorax, a speaker for the furry ones and the feathered ones. Can I figure out how to do activism in a way that is loving, gentle, inspiring and empowering in the midst of whatever work I do? That is the place where I receive the most regeneration and healing. I also think about the gifts that I came into the world with, how those have led me to where I’m at. I was granted gifts by spirit and in order to really honor them it’s about utilizing them and creating vehicles in which to use them and give them back. I want to make the world a better place. That’s what really drives me in the end, at the end of the day; did I make a different today with these skills that I’ve been gifted and have worked hard to develop? Have I made the best of them?”
Featuring the Voice and Wisdom of Dr. Sarah Sue Myers.
Listen to our full conversation on my podcast:
Episode 90: What Is Your Soul Calling Dr. Sarah Sue Myers?
I LOVE YOU
CHA 🍍 WILDE
TAKE HER WITH YOU
SHE SEES THE PRESENT MOVING FORWARD
SHE SEES THE PRESENT MOVING FORWARD
There is no time machine, no going back to the way it was. Stop spending your limited life on shit that doesn't exist anymore. You learned from your past and those experiences made you who you are but quickly now, stop staring at them. They are gone. All you have is right now and what is next. This is it. You don't even need to study your past, can you believe that? Do you believe me when I say it doesn't matter anymore? Do you trust me when I urge you to let it go, just like that. All you have is right now and whatever you're about to do next. I know it's tempting to gaze into your swirling past, that connection of intoxicating memories, endless hours of replay entertainment and exhausting analysis. No, you can say no. No, thank you, I'm done. I am right here and now. What is happening right now? What am I enjoying right now? What am I changing right now? What is my next exciting step? Where are my eyes directed, here here here! Where are your eyes directed right now? When the past calls your name again, turn your cold shoulder. “I have a new mistress,” you say, “She keeps me company when you just leave me lonely with my thoughts.” Who is your new mistress; you’re exotic fresh adventure fulfilling you today and calling you forward? What is possible now? Cut away the past, must I repeat myself! There is no fucking past. No more. Never again. All you have is right now and what's next.
SHE IS WITH YOU + I LOVE YOU
CHA 🍍 WILDE
TAKE HER WITH YOU
SHE LOVES GETTING HIGH ALONE
SHE LOVES GETTING HIGH ALONE
Simple. Serve self. Serve creativity. Describe your vision. What do you see in the blackness of your mind? Hold everything you're doing in your hand and spread your fingers. Let responsibilities and worrisome tasks slip through and fall away. Spread your lips and roll out the smoke. You don't owe anybody shit. Go be alone and enjoy being you. Inside cages, outside of cages, you always bring yourself. When was the last time you spent time with her, just the two of you and a whole body full of love?
SHE IS WITH YOU + I LOVE YOU
CHA 🍍 WILDE
SHE RADIATES HER LIGHT FOR THE WORLD
SHE RADIATES HER LIGHT FOR THE WORLD
I’ve given in to my childish temptation to throw away my graceful adultness. Sulking into shadows, denying anyone the satisfaction of cheering me up, refusing to share my gifts with my family, too stubborn to enjoy myself, to enjoy ME and all the light that I know I can shine. How exhausting it is being a black hole. Before quarantine, I was dancing on my couch in lingerie, blasting music for the neighborhood, sunbathing naked, playing with my pirate sword. What happened? Why am I on guard? Did my soul go into lock down too? My throat closed up. There’s a rock in my chest. Eye contact is like trying to push the wrong sides of magnets together. Creativity, those magical vibrations that loves to free flow through my body, is sadly clogged in my pours. I’m trapped inside my body, festering, unexpressed.
Before quarantine, I was splashing in solitude, space and silence. Now people can hear me and watch me work and this means they can see inside me. We’re living on top of each other and everybody is at home all day long. My work is not invisible; it’s captivating and I cannot escape attention in my most vulnerable moments of play. The inescapable pressure to be open and so seen, even among loved ones, is enough to scare the most courageous artist into her darkest corners.
For years, I’ve run away from home, breaking cages and jumping off cliffs into bohemian adventures. So free out there in the world, expanding. Singing my soul secrets to strangers. Now, in this home again, with these people again, I contract. I fall into the old ways. My weaknesses plague my mind. I’m moody. I remember the feeling of being too shy to perform and it takes over my body again. Did I walk back into the cage or am I smashing through the last remaining bars? One more push and it will be gone forever. Perhaps quarantine, is the blessing; shoving me into close quarters with my vulnerability until I give up my childish clingings and shine for everyone. Will quarantine be my chance to learn compassion? To break my ego? Will I finally let go of how things have always been, how I’ve always reacted and finally step forward fresh? Will I finally do the things I’ve imagined and refused for so long to take seriously?
As the world changes around you, it doesn’t matter where you live, who you are with or what you are doing. Right now, you can close your eyes and find yourself inside. This moment of darkness, this moment when your soul is wrestling, uncomfortable, this moment when you hate on everything and everyone around you, this is the moment of your greatest opportunity! The doorway to your new way of being is wide open, right now, if only you’ll walk through it. Will you? Step forward differently than you did yesterday and the gateway will welcome you as you create your evolution. Gather up your goodness and radiate your glow. Your cold blood will warm up. The rock in your chest will dissolve if you return to your breath. Now is the time to let go of the shell. You don’t think you can and yes, you can. The shell keeps away the love and freedom for which you’ve been longing. Imagine the sun. She never holds back from shining! Are you grateful for her light?
We are certainly grateful for your light. Please shine for us.
Repeat after me: “The freedom and delight in my soul is fucking marvelous. I let go of my shell so I may shine love and freedom. Nothing kills my vibe.”
May we all radiate our light for this world. She is with you and I love you.
CHA 🍍 WILDE
TAKE HER WITH YOU
SHE IS A GALAXY OF DANCING EMOTIONS
SHE IS A GALAXY OF DANCING EMOTIONS
Have you been to an online dance party on Zoom yet? We threw one last night for Davey’s birthday and over a dozen friends were dancing in their living rooms, wearing funny costumes, holding their wine glasses up to the webcam to virtually “cheers!”. Our faces, smiling through the screen, remind us in the middle of quarantine and global crisis, life always goes on. We give ourselves a reason to dress up and celebrate and we heal together. Birthdays, breakthroughs, new skills, new love, work opportunities, and just another Wednesday night still alive on Earth are all valid reasons to throw your next online dance party. Stream the music from one person’s computer and mute all the microphones. Before quarantine, we were at parties dancing AND TALKING. Now, we’re just dancing. Turns out, the talking wasn’t all that important. My most meaningful and memorable conversations are not usually at parties. They are events in their own right. The best parties are the moments when we shut up and dance! Do you feel me on this one? From quarantine, Zoom dance parties are a blessing, tossing us straight into word-free cozy dance floor full of smiles and eye contact. Plus, it’s never awkward because you get to peace out at the click of a button. Seeing the faces you love showing up to be in this moment with you, seeing inside other people’s homes, seeing other people put themselves out there just to make you smile; it instantly feels good in the blood. Happy hormones flood the body. Soul medicine. Boosting our immune systems and deepening our community. Be the one to host the party. People are so grateful to be invited. I get so many text messages pouring in afterwards saying how much they appreciated being included. It’s very heartwarming and worth it! If you are suffering today, remember you are a galaxy. Within you are all the emotions and states of being. Beside your sorrow, sits joy. Within your darkness is light. Celebration holds hands with grief. Today of all days is the perfect day to dance around the house in your underwear and fur coat.
Shout-out to our most upbeat buddy Seth Pearson of Love Amped for DJing our dance party last night!
Cheers to everything in life that is still wonderful. Peace to all the world. She is with you and I love you.
CHA 🍍 WILDE
TAKE HER WITH YOU
SHE WALKS ALONE TO STAY CONNECTED
SHE WALKS ALONE TO STAY CONNECTED
I sat in the middle of the street and stared at the full moon. My husband walked away back to the house. At first, I was sad to feel him leave but then a mysterious weight lifted off me. I was alone out here. So much time in quarantine, in the house, with the same people, all day long. I’m grateful to the constant company and solitude has become sweet. How would I feel if I were in solitary quarantine, alone in an apartment for weeks, like my cousin in Wes in LA or my friend Emi? Is the loneliness too painful? I’ve felt too lonely. Last summer, my car was broken and my roommates all went to work and I was home alone day after day, making music. I would go on a walk/run each day and have dinner with Davey but that was the most variety I had. Back then I wasn’t even using technology to stay in touch with people. I was straight up isolating and my mental health marched downhill. I suppose the only difference is that this year everyone else is in quarantine with me. The entire planet is in quarantine together. All of us are always ‘in quarantine’ inside our own bodies. From the moment we’re born until the moment we die (or until Tesla invents a way for us to body travel), we are stuck in this one body we wake up with each morning. All of our thoughts, feelings, creative energy, love is in this one body that you have. If you are in quarantine with other people, I invite you to step outside and walk alone. If you are alone in quarantine, I invite you to step outside and walk alone with all of us who are outside walking alone with you. Walk alone on the earth, perhaps barefoot, and feel how many blades of grass are tickling your feet and shaking your hand. Smile at the stars and the sunshine. Kiss the wind as she arrives to play with your hair and stroke your soft cheek. Walk alone to stay connected. In your solitude and meditation you find peace of mind, sense of self and strength of soul. I am outside walking alone with you. She is with you and I love you.
CHA 🍍 WILDE
TAKE HER WITH YOU
SHE FEELS WHAT SHE CANNOT SEE
SHE FEELS WHAT SHE CANNOT SEE
My grandmother died today. Covid-19, amongst other things, attacked her body and she was so tired in the end she didn’t want to eat. My brother got dressed up in all the protective gear and was allowed in to be her last visitor. He made her laugh. Today, my family is with all of the families who are losing loved ones. Life becomes more beautiful because of death. I drank my tea and watched the little birds in the bush and the beautiful sun was shining so slowly on me. I can still see my grandma in my minds eye. I know what she looks like when she laughs and just that thought makes me feel her in my chest. I went to the store and bought pretzels today because those were her favorite snack. How much grief is in the human energy field right now and surely it is matched by equal depths of peace and gratitude. Today, I give you this sparkly little woman who will sit with you, eyes closed, absolutely pained and absolutely peaceful. She sits with you here in the center of the universe where you find stillness and everything moves around you. Rest your hands on your lap, breath deeply. Can you feel the invisible? Can you sense your connection to those who are always with you? Be still and know. You are never alone. We are all right here with you. Slow down and feel our pulse through the fabric of this universe. Feel what you cannot see.
She is with you and I love you.
CHA 🍍 WILDE
